The one mistake everybody remember and forget all the good

One mistake and you’re done. Its a sad reality about life and about how people see us.

Its always the way when we try pleasing others. We end up pleasing no one. Guilty as charged, im  one of those who forget and reflected upon the feeling of being judged and worst being talked about. I mean, its not a good feeling. It makes me paranoid and I dont like it. 

All the good that you’ve  done will go down the drain;

into oblivion. Im reminded of one qoute of a famous gestalt psychologist : 

   

        I do my thing and you do your thing.

I am not in this world to live up to your expectations,

And you are not in this world to live up to mine.

You are you, and I am I, and if by chance we find each other, it's beautiful.

If not, it can't be helped.

Fritz Perls

This line said it all; we just cant please peaple, when we commit mistakes they seem to highight it and forget the good  things that we have done. If so then so be it. We cant do anything about it. Its time to move on to life and live . Pleasing others will just bring us to no where but exhausted and tired.

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On buds and waiting

two buds of this unknown stinky

Up close

I posted the close up picture on Instagram with a caption that goes I hope this bud would open soon. Im so excited to see the beauty of that bud. I have been waiting for it to open since last week,I check on it daily and have seen the change everyday. Though I really can't tell the detailed growth but I felt it has changed from that daily checking.

Waiting, seems to be simple word. Defined by Webster"s dictionary as to stay in expectation of; to look forward expectantly. Wow. that's really deep. It may sound that simple but the process is complicated. In this fast world where everything seems to be all instant, waiting is something that is not appreciated by many. I am even guilty of waiting for someone who came late in a agreed appointment, I hate the feeling of wasting time. Well, there are a lot of complexities of waiting, different circumstances and different reactions for we are all unique individuals. But at the end of the day it all boils down to the word patience. This year I am praying for more patience and the ability to look forward expectantly as expectant as the way I waited for this bud to open. As expectantly as the Lord reveals to me daily in His word in my life.

My day involves a lot of waiting.More often I would wake up in the wee hours  of the morning, waiting for sleep to but when sleep seems impossible I just wait for the clock to strike 5:30 am. Hay signs of aging wahahaha. Ana jud basta magka tiguang na. Signs of aging. I want to age gracefully and just take it one step at a time. Cooking - wait for my favorite dish; you have to wait properly to be able to serve great tasting food than serving half cooked or food  cooked with out love. It does happen sometimes; when I lose my patience in cooking I end up with half cooked food which may not be tasty. Since Noli (my God-given husband) and I do intermitent fasting I do cook breakfast but eat only during lunch time and no longer cook for lunch. Then, wait for the time again to cook for dinner. Then wait for my favorite My Special Tatay teleserye, then wait or dinner and wait to sleep and it goes on and on daily.

Gardening has taught me to wait and the daily routine of life.And with His word that I wait also for every day -revealing His unconditional love for me and has been patient with me despite of and inspite of my short comings, and failures. He corrects me gently and lovingly guides me to new areas of growth.

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Huernia schneideriana

 huernia schneideriana 

One of the rain or shine stinkies, not hard to care and 

can be propagated through cuttings. Flowers will not mature 

if this stinky lack either sunlight or water. If pkaced in

the best/desired  location of the plant the flowers will be inlimited year round.

Enjoy planting!

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Grafting journey 101

Published by Hazel Funcion

Lilies of the Field Page

November 22, 2016

grafted moons by me

grafting is fun 

Grafting is a new world for me; at first it was scary and then after it survived I wanted to graft more. These are my baby moons; its true, like life I experienced failures; in grafting moons; its not always a guarantee that its a good graft; but it does not mean that I will stop grafting; but I graft again and again to achieve the goal.in life we learn, unlearn and relearn; learning is a life long process.Even tried grafting Christmas cactus, lol, hope one day to see cute flowers from this.

The scion will not survive if its not properly connected to the root stock, like us if we are not connected to our Lord which is our root stock we will not survive, apart from Him we are nothing. So how do we connect to the root stock; we accept that we have sinned ask forgiveness and accept Him as Lord and savior. And let His word guide us daily in our lives. Joshua 1:8-9 says Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. 9 Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.”

Happy grafting, hope we can apply what Sir Lino Rom taught us.

Three years ago post from my facebook page. Bringing back the first moons that I grafted just applying what our speaker sir Lino taught us. I love to apply things learned as soon as possible while the motivation and the fire is still there. Three years ago, how time flies. I may have exerted effort and energy grafting them but there was a very slim chance of survival. That's why moons are not that cheap, they dont grow big, they die young. Even until now, but through the three years of grafting moons I have learned a couple of things that has helped me improve higher survival rate. Tried dragon fruit as root stock, pereskiopsis, bue boy and chichipe.

 First, the dragon fruit root stock is the most common since its not hard to find and its really cheap. You can ask from a neighborhood who grows dragon fruit or buy a couple of cuttings and then propagate it and use as root stock. The problem with dragon fruit is that its rots easily when over watered which could also kill the cactus.  The second root stock that I have used is the pereskiopsis, the smallest yet most terrible among the four. Why? because the spines are so thin and its really painful.Though its best to use when you have very tiny like seedlings and tiny cactus pups. Its also strong and can hold the cactus as it grows. But aesthetically speaking, its not my favorite. It looks odd, because when the cactus that was grafting grows in size, it looks like a lolipop. Next, the blue boy, this is my favorite among the columnars since it looks pretty with its blue silverish color when its under full sun. So far, its the best root stock that I have ever used, since it does not rot easily, its not so complicated to handle because the spines are not so disturbing as the pereskiopsis or the chichipe. The last root stock that I have used is the chichipe, I ike it coz its bigger among the four and a great chance for the cactus to grow much bigger since its a good rootstock as well. The problem is that, the long shiny and sharp spines could really hurt if you are not careful. Careless as I am, I must admit that grafting using chichipe was a struggle.

 grafted on dragon fruit 11/29/2016 ( Before)

March 3, 2017 After

grafted on pereskipsis

I thought I just used those four, and Im glad while skimming through group posts I saw this picture. wow!!!!!

grafted on opuntia

Made me realize. I have grafted using five different root stocks. wow. Isn't it amazing? Im just happy. and at the same time excited to revive my grafting journey. Hope it will bring me to exciting root stocks and also learn more about the art of grafting cactus.

See you on the next update!
God bless us all.

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He breaks us, to make us.

He breaks us to make us
Genesis 32:22-32

 There's a good reason God calls his people sheep. Sometimes they act bad and wander away from the paths he has mapped out for them.

A good shepherd will relentlessly search for a wayward sheep. Sometimes; if the sheep refuses to follow his master; the shepherd takes a drastic action; he breaks the sheep's leg; and places it upon his shoulders and carried the sheep until it learns total dependence. Tough love - the shepherd breaks the sheep to make sure the sheep always follows the shepherd.

We may think that a God of love would never allow His children feel any pain. But sometimes God breaks us to make us better. He may break our hearts so we will make room for him there. He mat break our will so that we discover his will for us. He may break our physical strength so that we discover God's strength is made perfect in weakness ( 2 Cor 12:9). Like Jacob, the best response to God's tough love is to cling to him and earnestly pray, " I will not let you go unless you bless me."
If you've been acting like a bad sheep and have wandered off the path, climb up on the shepherd's shoulders and let him carry you home while healing.

euphorbia sp; dont know the ID of this euphorbia

I find this plant quite interesting with all the colorful cute spines around and truly of one my euphorbia favorite. Not only because its pretty reddish spots and grows in  a twisted manner. I wish I was able to take a picture the matter one which  was sold last bazaar. Full sun and easy to propagate through cuttings but you have to dry the cut stem for a couple of days until the wound has dried up and its good to plant in a fast draining soil mix to prevent rotting and over watering.

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Huernia zebrina blooms

Huernia zebrina blooms

Was not able to notice that she had been flowering the past days bcause it was placed where the side with flowers was away from sight. I was surprised to see the withered flowers. Soooooo happy; sorry plants I’ve been busy doing other things.  These stinkies have been neglected. Will find time.

 This huernia zebrina one of the stinky group which means the flowers of these stinkies emit foul odor, but not really that foul. Its tolerable unless you put your nose trills near the flower. So far, among the stinkies group, the Stapelia gigantea really is noticeable. You can't deny that it really stinks. Like a the smell of dead rat. They are not hard to care; just leave them under full sunlight and water every other day and surely the blooms will be unlimited.

Plant care:

Rain or shine.

Lack of water and sunlight may abort the bulbs.

Fast draining soil mix.

Propagation:

Stalks with roots

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Portulaca gilliesii addict

Started with one pot and now I have propagated this all time favorite succulent. Not hard to care and one of the hardy succulents; lots of sun and water And you’ll get the happy red color with her pretty pink flowers.

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A month of neglect

Yay! So much to do so little time. Let’s get it on!

Finding time to remove the weeds before it chokes the plant. 

Hmmmmm; need to  remove the roots; I plan to bring batches of plants inside and do the unweeding while watching tv.  ( Is there an unweeding word in the dictionary? wahahhhahaha I'not so good with words so pardon me for inventing words)I don't watch much tv but its better doing it inside the house; the heat might affect my unweeding battle.  Getting my hands dirty is a kind if therapy; the feel of dirt and soil and the relief if pulling each weed that starts to choke the poor plants. The weeds sucked the life out of the poor cacti, they crowded the nutrient rich dirt, preventing the new robust cactus and succulents.

The process reminds me of  the weeds in my heart.Worries, doubts, fears, hatred, resentment,insecurities and a lot more. Its choking my heart. And my own confidence and own strength would not suffice. I'm so human with all my frailties and need God to help me up root those weeds that slowly choked it. 

The process. Pulling weeds from the garden of my heart.

Its uncomfortable.

Its painful.

But it's time to slowly let it go.

Time for new growth.

Time for new life.

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My kind of therapy

      I never thought that its more than a year that I was able to blog. I did'nt even noticed that I was able to chronicle my renewed passion for cactus and succulents here in this blog. And its really something that I missed. Oh wow! What a waste; so sayang; I hope I still have my first purchased succulent and how it died a week after and how I traveled unfamiliar grounds just to buy my second chance cactus and succulents and how it felt after I did my first online line cactus and succulents order.

     I wish I could turn back time; wahahahaha wishful thinking; but I hope I was able to document properly coz there's always a hundred percent chance that Id be able to post those again.

     Well its time to hunt my facebook pictures and see if I had them there; I even created a facebook page so that I can post unlimited pictures and soon will be deleting it i a two weeks time because of careless and and it has caused me trouble.

     At one point, I call this my kind of therapy and also my source of stress, wahahahaha but not much. I get stressed when I'm not at home and the plants make me worry a whole lot wahahaha.

      I've been through mild depression when I came here to Cebu three years ago, gave up my 18 career at PLDT after our wedding, a new strange place with no friends, away from my comfort zone which is Cagayan de Oro. It was not easy. There were days I felt self pity with no job and just at home, I felt useless and with no regular earnings. I was an independent woman the bread winner of the family for since papa died and now. I felt the room was a prison cell for months. I was just sleeping all day long. I dont take a bath the way I used to when I was in the corporate world. I was always sad and lonely and alone and still adjusting the married life. I was unproductive during those first months in Cebu. I was away, I was in a battle with those giants I created on my own. I used to wake up so early in the morning mostly at dawn to do quiet time with the Lord but I was consumed by my own doing. But one day God spoke to me in Psalm 23:6 Surely your  goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life. I was like the verse popped and woke me up from such uselessness and self pity,I was not giving God thanks for all the blessings He showered to me that time. But praise God  for His unfailing love. He wants to use me for His glory.

     I praise God for He has taught me to be thankful in all the blessings in life, counting my blessings and with a thankful heart.

     Thank you ate Juby for helping through the help of cns. Its been a three year journey now and its a loving and growing relationship with new found friends and family.

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