27 December 2005

Christmas Wont be the Same Without You....

" It's the time of year , When good friends are near, Tryin' hard to find a quiet moment ,Sharing love and joy , Children with their toys, Sadness fills my heart to see you go,Christmas won't be the same without you , Christmas won't be the same if you go, All I need to see standing by my, Christmas tree, Christmas won't be the same without you"

A very nice song by Martin Nieverra. 11 years ago, I kind a associated this song with lovers or couples celebrating their christmas away from each others arms, separated by distance, or lovers who have parted ways for good. Its a song about the idea of being away from a person you truly love on christmas day. In my case its the other way around. I consider myself one of those people who can relate with this song but with a twist.

My christmas was never the same after father died. I was left with a mere memory of those christmases with him around. A history, a longing that remained and was kept somewhere in my heart. A longing that i know will no longer be fulfilled even in my dreams. Im a papa's girl and for me it was painful, so painful it makes me cry every time I hear this song. He left us when I was just on my first year in college. Left with a pension which could barely feed a family of seven kids, I have to work as student assistant in the school library to somehow help in the expenses at home. The library was my sanctuary in those emotional stage of my life. I would tire myself with the library work to the point of forgetting the pain engulfing my heart. I kept the pain to myself knowing its the best thing to do, I never cried at home, I never showed them my pain.

After 11 long years after my father died, I never thought it still hurt this much until I heard the song again. Each line of the song echoes the sound of each tear that fell from eyes. A pain i never imagined that was just there waiting to release itself from my heart. Crying in silence was my only way out from this self imposed torture from a past pain that i unconsciously or consciously refused to put an end. We dont stay in this life forever, we will have our time to go. Im just glad that im stronger now with my True Father, who have been there all the times of my life. Though I have lost my biological father I have a father that never dies and lives forever more. I have to move on, slowly release myself from a pain that will heal itself in time. So to all of you who still have your fathers, please please, show them how much you love them, now that you still have the chance to hug them and how grateful you are for their gift of life.

CHRISTMAS WON'T BE THE SAME WITHOUT YOU
By: Martin Nievera

It's the time of year
When good friends are near
Tryin' hard to find a quiet moment
Sharing love and joy
Children with their toys
Sadness fills my heart to see you go
Christmas won't be the same without you
Christmas won't be the same if you go
All I need to see standing by my Christmas tree C
hristmas won't be the same without you
I remember when
The times we used to spend
Walking hard in hand until the sun sets
Then came Christmas Eve The wish you gave to me
How I wish I tried to make you stay
Repeat Chorus
It's been a long long time I need you by my side
Hold me tight Don't let go Let go
Repeat Chorus (2x)
Christmas won't be the same
Christmas won't be the same
Without you

2 comments:

Speed said...

your message somewhat reminds us all that how lucky we are coz our fathers are still with us celebrating christmas.

Anonymous said...

its the time of year we remember significant people in our lives, and a season to spread love to those who are still with us.....