I hope there could be a painting that could somehow describe what Im feeling right now. I feel hopeless, I feel annoyed, bitter and angry. But I have to look ok and pretend everything is awesome. I want to cry, but I wont. I refuse to. I dont want to. Then, if it would have been a painting, what would it look. It would look terrible to look at with those terrible emotions. Im a pych major graduate and I cant apply those theories to myself. Tsk tsk tsk
No matter how I try, no matter how I pray, things are just beyond me. Its beyond my control, no matter how much effort I exert on getting on my knees and beg God. Its all up to Him. But more often may be im just creating that impression on people, and I end up getting hurt and getting nasty side comments in the end. But, God is in control, I believe He will complete what He has started, the answers to my prayers may not be given today, it may not always be a yes, a no and wait. I know I will have to embrace that with a hopefull heart. He is a God who will always true to His promised, I will wait on Him, patiently. Change for the better. I hope I also change for the better, not just expect others to be so, but for that change to start in me.
Ways to cope such emotion:
1. Say all you want to say to that person.
2. Then, if that person answer, defend yourself.
3. If the person defends, then answer back.
4. If that person tell you to shut up, then shut up. Just blog.
5. Let it all out, blog it, express it.
6. Just pound the keyboard as hard as you can with words.
7. Take a deep breath.
8. Smile.
9. Pray.
10. Pray.
11. Memorize bible verses
12. Claim God's promises.
13. ACCEPT. You cant please yourself and you cant please everyone and everyone cant please you.
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